About myself

Out of a fit of curiosity, I decided to goggle myself by my actual name. (Apparently someone has done this before and I was wondering what he might have found.) Some things were expected, ie my resume which is linked to my old homepage and it is good to know that I was indeed added to the official CFM and CMA lists. But some of this was shocking; it’s like an autobiographic history lesson. Apparently, sometime in my past, I had signed a petition for a mixed Asian action channel. I don’t even have any desire to subscribe to the anime channel through my cable provider. However I definitely made my name in the anime world back in the day. Also evidently, I was featured in a couple ASU publications. I don’t remember any of these articles existing. I don’t even remember the photo being taken for one of the articles. And I forgot to take down some inventory that I had put up for sale on half.com over a year ago. But luckily I’m not as popular as some of you out there, who are making names for yourselves. And as far as I can tell, none of those photos that I posted, when the internet just started, ended up as porn as my mom was initially afraid of. Now that I think about it, what happened to those high school photos with my face censored out by the talented Nick K.? Ah well, I guess some things were lost out there.

Contemplations

Where are you?
Where are you going?

Are you happy?
Is happiness all that matters?

If only you knew, what would you do?
What could you do?

Do you know me?
As I know you?

Can you see me?
What do you see?

If you believed, what would change?
Could you change?

Does it exist?
Why does it exist?

Can you imagine?
Beyond reality?

Do you have faith?
Do you know the truth?

Where is life going?
Where has it gone?

Thoughts

I am battling pre-legal-dependency urges as I step back into my parents’ home. I see their bulk filled pantry, courtesy of Costco, and think: wow look at all that food, maybe I could take a couple bowls of instant sesame noodles and a six pack of drinks back with me. They have also stocked up on a boatful of toiletries that could be useful in my home. There are only two things stopping me. One, I don’t feel like carrying a heavy suitcase full of groceries. Two, I realized I’m not in college anymore. It’s interesting to see how I tend to fall back into old habits when I return home back to phoenix. Afternoon naps, lying around watching marathons of anime, and relying on my parents to take care of me. I guess this is called being lazy in general.

However, I do feel more obligated to contribute to the household. I am trying to be more considerate and make an effort to contribute to household chores. In the past, my parents had to constantly remind me to clean counter tops after I made a mess cooking or even to do my own dishes, so I have matured in small ways. They are still rejecting my immaterial monetary contributions to their livelihood. Instead of being able to help with the two mortgages and series of remodeling expenses, I will be providing small impractical presents that they will hopefully enjoy. ^_^ Yet since my parents retired and are more financially limited than they were in the past, I wonder when do I grow up and truly help take care of them.

The Gift Plan

After a prolific amount of autumn birthdays, I have now found myself in the midst of Christmas. Inspired by the holiday decorations around the house, the bell merrily jingling on the dog’s collar, and the abundant advertisements sent via mail, TV and internet, I was re-energized for gift giving. Running to the mall and Christmas fairs almost every weekend, searching the net and e-bay, I got a multitude of presents that I tried to put some thought into. [To the people who are now receiving checks from me, it’s not because I didn’t want to put thought into it, quite frankly either you need the money to pay rent or you want stuff I could never afford.] However during the sales and Christmas cheer, my idea of a $10 per present budget quickly flew into the void. I saw my credit card bills and realized that my budget did not quite recover from the continuous birthdays throughout October and November. I also just realized that there are more birthdays come February and March. Which means two things…one, some of you might be only getting lunch or drinks on me when I see you over my vacation and two, I need to come up with a plan for next year. Here are some ideas:

1) Have some sort of pot-luck/gift swap party, so we only need to get one gift for everyone at the party, even if it includes non-mutual friends. (This one we had discarded this year due to the complexity of the arrangements, but I might suffer through it next year.)

2) Give everyone a “Andrea lottery ticket” meaning you get a raffle ticket from me and the lucky friend gets $100, which by the way the odds are better than a real lottery ticket.

3) Get everyone a real lottery ticket for $2, along with a candy cane as a consolation prize.

4) Realizing that all the ideas above don’t really put much individual thought into the presents, I could also do a budgetary x-mas plan. Meaning, I list all my friends out and give 2-3 present each month telling them not to open until x-mas. In this way, I can eliminate excess storage and be able to streamline my expenses over the year. I can also proportionally budget slightly more presents in the beginning of the year, in case new unexpected friends or other types of obligation giftees arise during the period or to overcome lumps in the budgets due to excess birthdays. Or even better, if I arrange to give the x-mas gift in cohesion with birthdays, I will probably be able to reduce gift expenses by at least 25-50%.

5) Suck it up, try to earn more money or keep eating ramen, and all will be good.

Ultimate Internet Quiz from Ryan and co.

Apparently Ryan and his friends made up this ultimate internet quiz last year, and I've been challenged to answer 1/3 of it. So here you go....

1. What was your best year? Why?
   
   It was probably 2000, because I had great friends, spent the summer in Europe, and had a bunch of great jobs: running research expos and anime store. Plus I was pres of the anime club, so I was the ultimate ruler, before I got burned out.


2. If you had to throw someone off a building, who would it be? Who would this person land on?
   
   Well I wouldn’t deliberately want to hurt someone, so I was throw a corpse over, and if it hits someone like, a certain CFO who makes life much too interesting, then it’s not my fault.


3. What is the longest you've maintained a close-friend relationship? With whom?
   
   Vivian’s been my friend since 3rd grade. ^_^


4. Name one thing you wish you'd done differently.
   
   I think I shouldn’t have told that guy I hated his guts in 4th grade, when his friends where teasing me about how he liked me. *_*


5. What one sin should be taken off the list of Seven Deadly Sins? What should be added?
   
   Gluttony, I don’t see anything wrong with eating a lot, plus greed is already on there so it’s a little redundant. They should add deceit, not sure if it wasn’t added since it was covered in the 10 commandments though


6. The moment in your life you'd most like to re-experience.
   
   I once had this dream (actually dream while sleeping) that I was living in this gorgeous beach house/condo with three cute guys. I woke up and they were cooking me breakfast, going to do my laundry, and willing to drive me around. That would be nice. In reality, I think I’m always looking forward to new experiences with great friends, but even if you try to do something again it’s never the same as the first time.


7. You can spend a week anywhere/anytime in history. Where do you go?
   
   I wish I could go back to a time that would help someone: ie go back to the week of sept 11, and tell someone about the bombs on the planes. But I tend to believe in predestination that if something was going to happen then it would, and you can’t change history. And I’m not that enamored of history, to want to see something bad. So maybe it would have been fun to spend a week in China on a river tour last fall.
   


8. 8) What movies/books/TV shows did you act out as a kid?
   
   I used to sing Disney songs a lot…does that count?
   


9. What behavior do you find morally objectionable (or too risky to try), but extremely tempting?
   
   Hmmm…skinny dipping. Too risky to try, the water would be freezing.
   


10. Which song lyrics capture you or an event in your life most clearly?
    
    So I only listen to lyrics of songs when I’m moody and depressed or in musicals. When I broke up with my ex, I could probably identify with 20 break-up songs esp Don’t want think about you from Simple Plan. But I really like Crazy by Simple Plan, because I think it’s really true and I feel the same way.
    


11. Your most representative childhood comment/anecdote/mindset:
    
    Happily ever after. I believed in fairy tales.
    


12. "Might have been the losing side. Doesn't mean it was the wrong one." When has that applied to you?
    
    Sure, but who determines who “won”?
    


13. Favorite word or phrase in a foreign language
    
    “suki” is the verb, like, in Japanese. It’s cool to say and it’s only one syllable
    


14. What food would you cry about having eliminated from your diet?
    
    Mangos….I don’t get those often enough.
    


15. What is the BEST smell, and what does it mean to you?
    
    Vanilla…..yummy very relaxing.
    



16. Name five [non-physical] qualities that draw you to a person
    
    Confidence, intelligence, easy going humor, generosity, honesty
    



17. 17) And five [non-physical] things about someone that turn you off. [No points off for pettiness.]
    
    Snoring, negativity, uselessness (or people who never help out), boring conversationalists, cheapskates
    



18. If you could eliminate three things from your life, what would they be?
    
    Driving, freezing weather, weekend workdays
    



19. What would you want to be reincarnated as?
    
    Cat- spoiled cat - with a nice owner with enough money to pamper me.
    


20. Build your dream house. Now describe it.
    
    On a private beach that allows dogs. Small and comfortable with two levels lots of windows, and a stream in the back with a small, wooden bridge running over it. High speed internet, good cell phone signal, a full sized laundry, excellent plumbing/electricity, jacuzzi would be nice, and within 10 min drive to a grocery store, movie theater, bakery, and a few really good, preferably cheap, asian and french restaurants.
    



21. It's two hundred years in the future, and your name is still remembered. What for?
    
    The great-great-great…grandmother who won the lottery and built the family fortune.
    



22. You're casting it all aside and running away. You've got nothing but the money you have/can take from the bank now. Where do you go?
    
    I’d go live in bay area California. And after all my money ran out I’d hang out with my parents or whoever can give me free rent for a while. *_*
    


23. Give yourself a nickname (e.g., Becky "Barracuda" Cooper)
    
    I like barracuda. But hmmm…Andrea Banana?? *_*
    



24. Everyday person who's had an effect on your life that they'd be surprised to hear about:
    
    Nomi, I like how she can make people feel good, even when she’s tell them bad news. I try to go that too. *_* not sure if it’s working.


25. Pick one fictional character each to do, dump, and marry.
    
    To do: Rejar from Rejar by Dara Joy,
    To dump: Anakin from Star Wars
    To marry: Prince Hall from the Unhandsome Prince by John Moore….but maybe when he’s a bit older, or Jeffrey, his older brother. They’re nice and sweet.
    

The Horror (part 2)

Smokey doesn't even need a costume for halloween.


click here, if you don't see the photo

The Horror

The cool autumn air brushed over us as we hurried from the trendy sushi place on the lower east side. It was the night before Halloween, and tonight we were going to Nightmare, “the scariest haunted house in Manhattan.” Tickets were sold out, but there was still a long line outside the door for people who had booked reservations several days in advance. The only decorations on the walls of cultural center were fliers for other Halloween parties and events around the city. Not much had gone into thematically enriching the outside, or the inside, as we were soon to discover. The lobby looked like it belonged to a cross of a theme park ride and a cheap night club. There was a ticket booth, and two big screens showing gruesome horror film clips that covered movies, student films, and even a Michael Jackson video. Hidden behind black curtains was a bar lounge with zebra striped chairs and a Heineken neon sign. If you were in line, waiters would bring orders while you were waiting. The staff wore black clothing complete with headsets and trendy club music played in the background. Then we approached the doorway. Covered by heavy black curtains, I shoved my boyfriend in front of me and grabbed his hand as we went into the darkness. Our group was led into a dimly lit room, behind a man sitting in front of a ventilation fan. The man moaned and slowly reached towards the fan, and we all knew what was going to happen next. The lights cut out just before his hand touched the blade, and we felt blood splash across our face. Screams pierced the air, and it was the beginning of the thirteen rooms of horror we were to endure. But it was all fun and we left laughing in the end. I love haunted houses. I can’t wait ‘till next Halloween.

How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?

I work in an area nicknamed named “the fishbowl.” Our room of cubicles is encased by almost floor to ceiling windows looking into a hallway, which has more windows extending to the outside. So anyone wandering the hallways can look in at us, walking around, darting into cubes, and staring back out at them, wondering when we’ll see freedom.

Today I was standing staring avidly out one of the windows. My co-workers passed me by and asked what I’m doing lurking outside my cube. To which I replied, “There’s an animal out there, and I can’t figure out what it is. I think it might be a beaver, but don’t beavers live near water?” The furry brown animal was sitting in a huge lawn of grass. Then she looked out too, and she noted, “It looks like a rabbit, except for the tail.” I agreed, “It doesn’t have the ears for a rabbit too.” She guessed, “I think it’s a squirrel.” “That’s a pretty huge squirrel,” I repsonded. Can they get that big, I wondered, thinking of some of the French river rats I had seen, which were admittedly the size of a beaver. Then finally some wandering business man called out “It’s a woodchuck” as he passed by. I was amazed, “Wow, a woodchuck, I’ve never seen one before. Is that what one looks like?” We stared at it for a while. Then my co-worker spoke, “I’ve never seen a woodchuck either, you think he said chipmunk.” I was thinking it’s still too big for a chipmunk, and we needed to stop augmenting small rodents to justify the appearance of this new creature. So enough wasting our precious work time, I went back to my comp to check it out online. It was a woodchuck, aka groundhog. For those of you who have never seen one either, here’s a photo. Another one of my great NY experiences.

How much do you care?

In the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, many of us are being affected by the barrage of new stories and higher gas prices. However, as we are not actually there, there is no way to truly understand what it feels like. Empathy alone seems to me inconsequential compared to what actually is going on. We can only imagine the pain of loosing your home and loved ones, and be grateful that it is not us and pray for those who are still suffering.

I just heard the stories about people being forced to abandon their pets in order to get a seat on a transport or bus. I think if it was me, this would be the last issue to tip me over. It’s one thing to loose everything that you have, but then to have to give up something willingly would be completely agonizing. I don’t know if I could leave my dog behind on the street while I got on a bus and drove away. But in the end if you’re being evacuated, it won’t be optional. At least, there are several rescues working on bringing pets to shelters, where they might one day be reunited with their owners in the future or be adopted with a new family. This natural disaster reminds me of old war movies of people who were displaced from their homes and separated from each other only to hopefully be reunited after the tragedy is over.

If you’re interested in helping out pet rescues follow this link.

Version 7

Lotus Notes version 7 is coming out. What is Lotus Notes, you ask? It’s IBM’s software competing with Microsoft’s outlook application. There’s whole set ofother products competing with office, but that’s another topic I’ll never go into. The Lotus development group (recently re-name WPLC) decided to give us IBMers a 30 minute promotional presentation on the new version, to be released internally in the beginning of 2006. We were incented by free ice cream… and toppings that were to be given out after the presentation. Not only that, but the person who writes the best article about the coolest new feature on Lotus v7 will win an ipod.

It was amazing how hyped up office workers can get. The first feature introduced was developed to manage overload of e-mail… Do you ever come back from two days of vacation, sit down at your desk, and see 100 new e-mail messages waiting to be answered? Well, now Lotus Notes v7 can help you manage that. This new application will mark messages based on whether you’re in the TO line, one of several recipients on the TO line, or even better if you’re in the CC line. “Ooooooooh” goes the audience. Yes, even I was pulled into the magnetism of the new Lotus Notes Application.

There’s definitely some great new features, lots of oohs and aah, and even applauds. But then I thought about it later. In order not to be on low priority and to get an answer, I need to remember to put the person alone in the TO line and possibly send multiple e-mails if I have questions for several people on the same subject. I’m sure everyone else will figure it out. I wonder how many people will abuse the work arounds. Ah well, the ice cream was good, I had strawberry with marshmallows and nuts. It was a fun presentation.

Love Voodoo

A friend of mine recently gave me a love voodoo doll kit. At first, I was slightly disappointed it wasn’t a regular voodoo doll, which I could definitely use in my free time. But I’m dating again, so I’m sure this one could definitely come into use. It covers spells from breaking up couples so you can get your guy to dealing with bra straps. Most of the spells are pretty generic ie. if you want to be more articulate, put the doll between a dictionary and thesaurus. But some spells are way out there, ie if you want to get the guy to pick up the check you need to attach a picture of Czech leader Vaclav Havel to the hand of the doll. Now I have no clue who this guy is or what that has to do with paying a bill, but let me know if you do. But the best part is that the book is hilarious. Even for the most superstitious person, you can tell straight off that it’s just fun and games. The author “Voodoo Lou” makes you smile with his sardonic logic. So if you’re looking for a no brainer, and want to poke holes into something you should pick up this kit.

The infinite search

Trying to find an affordable place to live in NY with a dog is like trying to find an affordable place to live in LA when you’re a full-time unknown actor. You can be responsible, considerate, clean, but once you mention that one seemingly trite liability, the rental agents don’t call, the landlords hang up, and you get rejected right and left. I even got a solicitation on roommates.com from a lesbian couple, but was unwanted once they found out about my dog. Then you start thinking of settling. Looking farther away so it takes 45 minutes ….50 minutes….or even a little over an hour to get to work. Or thinking, you really don’t need to be close to a laundry, it’s a luxury item if you think about it. Or maybe the place you’re at is just fine, even though you can’t use more than two appliances in the kitchen without blowing a fuse; the stove is missing; and there’s annual floods and periodic rusty brown water. After all, it has a pretty view and a washer/dryer. Well, let’s hope something good happens. Maybe someone will get evicted from the one pet friendly apartment in White Plains. Or I receive an inheritance from a long lost relative, so I can just buy a place. Well you never know miracles can happen.

Small dog personality

It's been confirmed again. This time from tickle.com, I have a small dog personality. *_*

You're a Yorkshire Terrier!

No bones about it, you're a social, bustling Yorkshire Terrier. Active and enthusiastic, Yorkies like you have a ton of energy — which means you're probably always running around like a mad dog. You're never without a project to work on, an errand to run, or a party to catch. (Where do you find the time?) You're a chatty little pup, too — talking is one of your favorite pastimes. That's why all your friends and acquaintances see you as their own personal Entertainment Tonight and rely on you for the latest gossip and social bulletins. You always liven up a dinner party or cocktail gathering, and people simply adore your affectionate nature and get-up-and-go eagerness. Woof!

Free Cell Phone! (only w/ the activation of a new contract)

I have fallen into the craze and am going to get the new “Special Edition” Black Razr v3 phone. Since I found out that Cingular actually has decent signal in my area, I decided to switch providers. And I've been dying for a bluetooth phone. So how am I going to afford this phone, which Cingular now offers for $200? Yes it is more affordable than the price in December, when the silver version was just released. Yet I’m still on a budget. So I need to find a deal right? Not so easy…. I figured I’d pass on what I discovered, in case it might be useful to someone.

I realized that most of the on-line sites offering free Razr phones are actually supported by a company call Inphonic, ie intelenetwireless.com, wirefly.com, buy.com, A1wireless.com, etc. On some of these sites, you’ll notice that the company address and phone numbers are the same. There are steady complaints from the customers in regards to difficulties receiving their rebates or fixing problems with new phones. Also if you want to keep your phone number, sometimes they’ll port it before your phone is shipped, so you won’t have a phone for a few days. The good points about these companies? Well the phones almost always come unlocked and are extremely cheap, sometimes you can even earn money. There were some satisfied customers, I've had friends who used the sites and never had problems with the phone or rebates. But they were "earning" money and initally spent a lower amount so had lower risk.
(Side note: if you ever want to see some of the most pessimistic ratings/reviews for on-line stores reviews, go to resellerratings.com. More positive ratings/review can be found at bizrate.com.)

Amazon.com has better reviews and will still offer the phone for free. In general, customers are satisfied with the customer service, and they have a reputation to maintain so they won’t scam you on the rebate. I heard that they're pretty good with replacing/fixing malfunctioning equipment, and they'll pay for return shipping. The bad thing is they can’t port your old phone number to a Cingular phone. They're OK with other providers though.

For Best Buy, the on-line deals are much better than the store deals. I understand though, that you can order a phone on-line and pick it up in-store if it's in stock. It sounded odd, so I’d probably want to double check that one. But the phone isn't free. The black Razr v3 phone is offered for $150 in store, and $90 on-line. I heard you shouldn’t go for their extended warranty, since their service isn’t that great. But again they're pretty reliable in that they'll try to fix any of your problem and they won't try to scam you on the rebate.

The Chinatown option was suggested to me by friends. Many people know that Chinatown usually has some awesome deals for cell phones. In addition, you can bargain for free accessories, they can unlock it for you, and when paying cash you can avoid taxes. These guys usually know what they’re doing. You can get the phone immediately and they’ll port it for you. But Chinatown isn’t the most reputable place to receive a phone. If you walk into the wrong store you might be getting a bootleg version. I'm not sure if just going to “authorized dealers” will solve the problem. Also you might have some difficulties in getting problematic phones fixed or your rebate back, if the store manager wants to be difficult. But if you have no problems after the fact, you’re set. I've had friends who bought phone there with no problems as well. I also heard that if you really have issues with the phone, you can try going directly to the manufacture (in this case Motorola) and they'll help you there.

Btw if you’re wondering how these guys can afford to offer free phones, there is an unconfirmed rumor that the dealers tend to get extremely good commissions (over $200) for each new account they activate. Plus, you get locked into a 2 year contract with these deals. I guess another condition for the dealer is that the s/he has to show proof that you are a good customer and fully paying off your bills, because most rebates you need to show a fully paid bill after 6 months. Amazon allows you to send in a statement showing your bill is fully paid after one month, but they have in fine print: if you default on any of the bill in the next 6 months, they can charge your credit card for the rebate amount.

So what am I going to do? I’m going to try for Amazon, and just give up my phone number. If I really wanted someone to get in contact with me, then I probably gave them my e-mail too. But don’t worry if I still like you and remember you exist, you’ll probably get a message from me with my new phone number in a couple weeks.

Asexuality

I have decided to become asexual...at least for the short term. I really do hate dating. I mean relationships are great, but trying to get that point stinks. I won't go into the latest and greatest experiences now, but ugh why me? My friends asked me why I don't become a lesbian instead. I reply that I think dating girls was just as bad as dating boys. I know both genders have their issues. Plus I'm not attracted to girls. Not to say that I have an overwhelming lust for men right now either. Hence, asexuality. Right now, the thought of trying to get romantically invovled with anything is so unappealing, that studying is starting to look good. So for the next month, I'll be throwing myself into studying for the next certification exam and hanging out with platonic friends. Maybe by the time I pass the next exam, I'll rebound and jump back into the dating scene. Maybe...

Loss

I wish that life was easier in some ways. Or I guess I wish relationships were easier. It seems that all around me, people are breaking up: friends, lovers, family. What is worse: when someone leaves you because of death, and you know you’ll never see them again, or when someone leaves you because they no longer want to be with you, but you know they are well and one day you may see them again? I think there are worse things than death. I think it hurts less if you know someone has to leave you, opposed to knowing that they no longer want you. On the other hand, it is a small comfort that you could see someone you care about again, even if you know that it’s highly unlikely or that it would be better to never see that person again.

I wish that people could just be satisfied with those that care about them and who are currently with them. But there is something perverse in human nature that makes us want something we cannot have. I wonder why we miss and care so much for those who are so wrong for us or who can no longer be with us. Maybe my friends and I are just too young and restless. In the end, I know we’ll all be fine. But in the meantime, I wish we could stop yearning for those who are no longer with us, and just be happy.

The Sexy Voice

I was listening to the radio on the drive home, and this girl with a really sexy voice came on. She made me think of luscious lips, long hair, big eyes, and full firm breasts. I was thinking, “wow I wish I had a voice like that.” But then the DJ mentioned she was waif-like. OK there went my voluptuous image, but she still sounded sexy. And she was still pretty from the way the DJ was reacting to her.

I really don’t think I’ve ever noticed such an incredibly sexy voice before. I mean maybe I’ve heard some on TV, but I tend to be distracted by the visual images and don’t notice the audio effects as much. And I don't plan on calling 1-900 numbers trying to find one.

Anyway, it’s amazing sometimes…the expectations people have based on the way others sound. There was this one woman at work who we all expected, from her phone voice, to be young, blond, and thin. When we all saw her photo, we were like “woooah….” Yeah, in other words, speechless. She was older, heavy boned, with really short brown hair. But she still had a cool, cheerful phone voice.

I think a great talking voice is awesome, because it really makes people want to listen. Unfortunately it's something you’d need to be born with. As it is, I think my voice is child-like and is only good for an impersonation of Aqua singing Barbie Girl. Ah well….that’s life.


5/18 - P.S. I just got a phone call and the woman asked to talk to my 'mommy." Great.

Movie Jitters

Everyone has told me that going to a movie on a first date is not a good idea. The reason was because you’ll be wasting 2 hours staring silently at a screen and not getting to know each other. And never in my life, have I ever thought there could be anything illicit about going out for a dinner and a movie.

However about a month ago, I had a bad date, where Mr. Wandering Hands took me to see a movie. Now when a guy suggests a movie during the first date, my gut reaction is to say, “Yeah, why don’t we get to know each other first before we see a movie together.” Of course I don’t say that out loud and sound freakishly prudish. I mean movie theaters are supposed to be places of normality, where things are R-rated at most. It’s not like the guy asked me if I wanted to watch porn…

I wonder if the real reason for not going to movies on a first date is because you don’t know the person, and you really don’t want to be forced to endure 2 hours being near a person who you don’t like. Well even if it’s not the real reason, it certainly has become mine. Now for me it’s like “Good girls don’t kiss (or go to movies) on first dates.” I must admit though, paranoia really isn’t a good trait to develop….

Dirty Shots

I don’t know why but the only girly shots that I know of are full of sexual innuendo. I’m not really into hard liquor like vodka, so I always need something with irish cream, frangelico, or kalua. But I just realized how bad the conversation sounds when I bring one up. For example...

Bartender: So what can I get you?
Me: Can I have an Orgasm?
Bartender: *smiles* Give me some time and I can give you one.
Me: *confused* you do know what goes into an Orgasm right?
Bartender: Actually I don’t.
Me: I wish I could tell you, people just give them to me. Something with Irish Cream?
Bartender: I really don’t know.
Me: Maybe it’s a NY thing. My ex didn’t know what an Orgasm was either….

Or what about, just a conversation with a friend about a Blow Job.

[I didn’t learn about these until this past year, so in case you don’t know...It’s a shot of Irish cream with whip cream piled up on it. To drink it, you put you hands behind your back and pick up the shot glass up with your mouth and chug it.]

Me: You know I just saw a girl do a Blow Job. I’ve never seen it done before.
Friend: I’ve done them before.
Me: Really? I think it would be rather difficult. I mean how do you fit your mouth around the glass?
Friend: Just open your mouth wide enough.
Me: Wouldn’t you choke trying to swallow? I mean that’s an awful lot of liquid coming down your throat.
Friend: You just have to learn to hold your throat open.

….I still haven’t tried a blow job, so I have no clue what “holding your throat open” means. I guess these really are girly drinks. I can’t imagine a guy trying order these, unless it was on the behalf of a girl. Plus when I ask for orgasms from girl bartenders, they know exactly what I want and I never have any problems getting one.

Oh! Canada...

So the original plan was to go clubbing all night in Toronto and right after drive 10 hours back to NYC. Thank god it didn’t happen and we just stayed in a hotel during the night. I mean yes I did write a lot of good-bye letter and good-bye phone calls before I left on this Toronto road trip, but it doesn’t mean I want to die. ...

A couple weeks ago, I went with some friends on this Toronto road trip. It was awesome we stopped one night in Niagara Falls and two nights in Toronto. Plus my concerns about the longevity of my life was assuaged at the beginning of the trip, when it was decided we should just stay an extra night in the hotel. If you ever get the chance to go to Niagara Falls, you have to stay for night time, when the falls are lit up. I could stare at it forever, it's really beautiful. Also there are always the shows, buffets, and the casino, where I promptly lost my $5 in slots. In Toronto, it was raining, so we resorted to the indoor shopping and eating excursions. I actually was able to see most of my family in Toronto. We made a brief detour so I could pick up a gift from my aunt. Apparently one of my cousins was having a B-day party, and all my other aunts, except one, were recruited into supervising. The house was like a scene out of “Cheaper by the Dozen.” There were only 10 kids there, but it seemed like thirty. They were all running around the house yelling. I was pretty dazed. We didn’t make it past the foyer, as I tried to stay out of the way of speeding objects. I think my friends were afraid we’d had to go in and sit down and talk, in the middle of the chaos, but I made my excuses and we left after the perfunctory greetings and small talk. It’s hard to remember what a big family I have, since I was raised pretty far away from them.

The road trip was fun, lot of joking around, and boy vs girl arguments. I would love to do another road trip, just maybe someplace closer next time.

On Ice

I just found the hotspot of Westchester teens. Friday night, I decided to stop by the rink to practice ice skating. Since high school, I have never seen so many teens together in one spot, except at the premier of American Pie 2. Left and right energetic girls and boys skating at high or shaky speeds, while guzzling cans of Red Bull. Times have really changed. When I was a teen, I don’t remember my friends and I ever saying “let's go skate” ever. And Red Bull? I tasted it once, and it made me gag. Well there was only so much time I could stand being in the midst of mounds and mounds of young screaming adolescents. So I quit after an hour and went up to skybox to grab a drink and check out the other rink.

Fortunately the adult hockey league was just starting a game. I’ve actually been interested in checking out a hockey game since I started skating. This was my first and it was awesome. Apparently the goalie of one of the teams was in a car accident, so they had to play the entire first period without a goalie. Everyone in the audience was thinking you’ve got to kidding. But the team was good, and there quite a few saves by defenseman 18. The first period ended 0-2. By this time I really going for the underdog team. Luckily for them, early in the second period, the other team got a 2 min penalty. Before the penalty was over, I guess someone had found a substitute goalie. Maybe they called in someone’s kid brother or pulled one off the public session, because either it was the smallest man I’ve seen or he was only a kid. But he was pretty good too, so by the end of the second period they were tied 3-3. The game ended 4-5, the underdogs lost, but it was cool game to watch. I do like live sports. I should watch more often. Plus hockey guys are kinda hot.

Writer’s Block

Ugh writer’s block. This is exactly the reason I decided not to go into anything creative. Well I promised I’d write something each month. It’s not that things don’t happen to me, I just seriously have nothing interesting to say. Give me another week, I’ll think of something. If you want, you can suggest a topic and I can creatively write about it. *_*

No druggies in NY?

You know it’s amazing. I live in New York and read articles about NYC all the time and rarely is there ever a mention of drugs, unless you’re talking about some medical scandal. In New York news, you get lots of stories about murders: freak subway accidents, snow plows running you over, shootings, and so forth. Other typical news stories are about politics, snowstorms, schools, sports scandals, but nothing about drugs. I first noticed this oddity when I went back to Arizona and saw a anti-drug commercial. I actually had to ask a friend what meth labs were. I seriously never heard of them before, and I still haven’t out here or any other type of drugs. Does this mean that drugs aren’t an issue in NY? Or maybe New Yorkers really aren’t interested in articles about drug abuse, so it never makes the news. Who knows…

Passed!!

I passed my exam...two more to go for the CMA/CFM certifications. Next exam is in May. But now I'm busy watching 2 series anime. *_* I'll write something soon.

Quizilla-mania

As I sit here procrastinating studying for my exam, see all the cool new things I learned about myself.
brought to you by Quizilla


?? Which Alcoholic Drink Are You ??



What kind of dancer are you? (Girls only)

You are an Exotic Dancer. You are the sexy lady in
the group, you love to play with people's
minds, you never show your true intents to
anyone, you like to have a lot of friends so
you don't get bored and this goes the same with
men, you don't like the strict guy who gives
you orders like he owns you, nobody does, cuz
you were born free and nothing would change
that.




What kind of kiss are you?

You are a child's kiss. Completely sweet and
innocent and pure. You mean no harm and only
love in your sweet kisses.

What's Your Angel Seeking For?


The Truth

Your angel seeks for the truth.
Your angel is part of you. Thus, you are the
kind of person who values honesty more than
most things in this world. You are
strong-willed, and a bit stubborn at times. In
love, you seek for someone who will understand
you, and never cheat on you. This would
probably hurt you a lot, as it would to a lot
of people. But it would probably hurt you the
most. You are brutally honest, and you voice
your opinions a lot. Go you!


What Inuyasha Character are you?


Your Kagome! you like to hang out with your friends
and are always the first person to volunteer to
show a new student around, you are kind and
giving and enjoy having a occasional sleep-over
with the girls!

What breed are you?

What Common Breed of Dog Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Slip and Slide

Well I’ll never say again that nothing interesting ever happens to me. After moving to NY, within the last year, I had the whirlwind relationship, got ditched, the dog got skunked, my place flooded for a month, the dog ran off, I got stood up twice by my ex, and met my first stripper. But this tops it all.

Saturday this huge snowstorm blows over fifteen inches of snow into New York. But it stops, the roads were plowed, and I decide I was tired of being cooped up and had errands to run. So I take the car out. Fifteen minutes later, the car skids, does a 180, and slams the passenger side into the curb. It didn’t look good; so I do what any stereotypical girl does…I call a guy for help. In this case, the only guy I know in NY is my ex. So I’m on the phone describing the damage, “both hubcaps on the right side of the car are cracked and missing pieces. Do you think I can still drive? Oh wait! I think I hear air hissing out of the back wheel… Do know how to change a wheel…..yes please come out.”

Then I realize that I looked like complete s#!&. Excuse the censored language, but it’s the only way to truly describe me. I didn’t think I’d run into anyone I knew, so I was wearing old baggy clothes from discount stores, glasses, no make-up, hair in a rat nest bun. No one ever wants to look bad in front of their ex, but I never carry around anything to make me look better. So there was nothing I could do.

The ex shows up, and he thinks my car is OK to drive, after all he’ll be right behind me. Even though I’m skeptical, I get in the car and drive about two feet, before he starts honking at me. I get out and see the back wheel. It’s tilted inward, not even standing up straight. Ouch. Don't worry my life gets even better. While the ex is getting the jack out to check out the wheel, the channel 12 news van pulls up. They pull out a camera and want an interview. I ask for a make-up artist… Ok it’s bad enough to look like crap in front of your ex. It’s ten times worse to look like crap in front of public television. I didn’t get my make-up artist, but gave them the interview. I was too tired to protest. But I guess that’s what reporters do, offer no help, suck up your misery and broadcast it, so others who know you can laugh.

Yep the next day, my grinning second-line manager stops by my cube and says “So what happened? I saw you on TV yesterday. I see this car with the tire all bent, and then suddenly your face flashes up on the screen. It was the highlight of my day. What the were you doing driving anyway?” I was hoping I didn’t make the cut. *_*

Well after the news van left, I called roadside service and my auto insurance. I’ll be paying out a bit for the deductibles, but the car will get fixed. The rental I have is a Ford Escort, which rattles, so I’m driving much slower despite any weather conditions. The body shop called me today. Apparently I snapped the rear control arm, the suspension is shot, I’ll be getting two new tires, etc. Luckily I survived with out any major injuries and will just be going to chiropractor a few times. But hey that’s life. We’ll see how the rest of this year turns out.

Do you believe in Cupid?

I am doubting that love truly exists. At least the romantic love, which all Americans hype up, where if you love someone enough, you’ll try to make it work and because you love them things do work out. The idea is that you’d rather be with them, than be alone and/or with someone else. You care enough about their feelings to compromise.

My friend, who just got married three months ago, can’t seem to have a conversation with her husband without arguing, even when they try not to. I’ve had two friends break off their engagements. Several parents of my friends and my own, argue a lot. A couple parents even got divorced, now that the kids are no longer there. I had my first “real” relationship within the past year, and now I’m really just friends with my ex, even though we still like each other.

I’ve seen relationship issues in the past. But that was in school and weren’t serious relationships…plus those relationships weren’t mine. I always thought that once we were past that phase of our lives, we would find someone who we would really love, get married, and live happily ever after….if we wound up with the right person.

I wonder if people are so individualistic that it in the long it never works out, and there really isn’t a "right" person. And that the only reason people stay together is because of some need that has nothing to do with love, like a desire for kids, financial support, cultural values, or the fear of being alone.

Am I starting to doubt something that exists but is just hard to find? Or am I just growing up and becoming more realistic about life?